"Better a fallen rocket than never a burst of light."
~ Tom Stoppard, The Invention of Love

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

(Possible) Asexual Sighting: Dr. Sheldon Cooper (The Big Bang Theory)

 
Sheldon is the first character I saw who truly seemed disinterested in sex.  I’d seen others who chose not to, and some for whom the subject never came up, but Sheldon was the first that didn’t seem to have a sexual bone in his body (yeah, yeah, I said “sexual bone” – everybody laugh.)
 
Since this is only a possible asexual sighting (no in-show confirmation,) I can only point to the evidence.  For me, the most compelling is Sheldon’s obliviousness to anything sexual.  In one episode, Raj’s blind date – a dental student – ends up taking a shine to him, and they leave together.  Later, when Leonard asks if Sheldon plans to see her again (after explaining why it was a faux pas to leave with Raj’s date,) he perplexedly asks, “Why would I see her again?  I already have a dentist.”  Sheldon searches for a boyfriend for Penny in another episode (for less than altruistic reasons) and fails to realize that the phone number he’s acquired is meant for him.
 
And when Sheldon does pick up on references to sex, he makes it clear he’s not interested.  Some will explain away his potential asexuality by pointing out his nerdiness and lack of social skills.  However, all four of the guys are nerds with varying levels of awkwardness, and even when Leonard, Howard, and Raj have been unable to get a woman, they still want to.  By contrast, Sheldon doesn’t see why anyone would choose sex over Halo 3.
 
Like with Sherlock, further evidence is found in the way people “other” Sheldon’s orientation.  The biggest example comes in an episode when Sheldon has wound up with a slavishly devoted grad student.  His friends are agog at the sight of Sheldon with a groupie, and Penny drags everyone into the hall to discuss Sheldon’s “deal.”  She asks the others if Sheldon is into “girls?  Guys?  Sock puppets?” and Leonard explains that they’ve “been operating under the assumption that he has no deal” (at which point Penny says there’s no such thing, naturally.)
 
This talk has increased in recent seasons now that Sheldon is dating Amy.  I have to say, their relationship really interests me.  They begin firmly as friends, but that ceases to be enough for Amy.  At first, Sheldon merely acquiesces to dating her, but now, given the choice, he doesn’t want to go back to being friends – he definitely wants her to be his girlfriend.  Since she’s the first woman we’ve seen him take a romantic interest in, I’m gonna say demi-heteroromantic.  In the two-and-a-half seasons they’ve been dating, they’ve held hands and kissed, which Sheldon would call moving pretty fast.  Amy, meanwhile, propositions him every chance she gets, and is often thwarted by his obliviousness.  Of the other ace and possibly-ace characters I’ve seen, none of them seem romantic, so I love that we’re getting this story with Sheldon.  I hope that, in episodes to come, they talk more about sex and find a way for both of them to be comfortable in the relationship, rather than Sheldon calling most of the shots and leaving Amy hard-up.
 
Representation-wise, it’s a mixed bag.  Sheldon is a hilarious, enjoyable character when the show avoids the urge to take him over-the-top.  He’s obviously brilliant, very accomplished, and he probably has the highest self-esteem of all the nerds on the show.  On the down side, he might be largely responsible for the socially-inept ace stereotype.  He’s rude, bossy, and illiterate at reading social cues.  Additionally, while there’s nothing wrong with his germophobia and possible ASD and/or OCD, some viewers might equate them as the cause of his sexual disinterest, giving credence to the idea that asexuality is a disorder instead of an orientation. 

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