"Better a fallen rocket than never a burst of light."
~ Tom Stoppard, The Invention of Love

Saturday, January 21, 2023

News Satire Roundup: January 17th-January 19th

The Daily Show is back, and for a good chunk of the year, will be without a permanent host. With guest hosts rotating on a weekly basis, the first to take the chair was Leslie Jones.

Tuesday, January 17

·        Headlines – Classified documents found at Biden’s home, criticism over new Martin Luther King Jr. statue

o   Leslie was highly concerned about the additional classified documents found in Biden’s garage, “next to [his] Corvette” – “What?! This is a national security emergency, okay? A man this old with access to a Corvette? I don’t know what’s more scary: Biden losing the nuclear codes or Biden going 85 on the highway.”

o   However, she figured the documents were probably safely hidden in his garage – “‘Grandpa, where’s the documents?’ ‘It’s by the leaf blower!’ ‘You have six leaf blowers, Grandpa!’”

o   A new statue of Martin Luther King Jr. was revealed in Boston, and its somewhat awkward composition has some people ridiculing it, some angry, and some just scratching their heads. Leslie started this bit with a word of warning – “White people, you don’t need to be saying shit about this statue, you understand? Black hands only! You need to sit your ass in the back of the bus for this one, okay?”

o   She pointed out that a lot of statues were probably badly received when people first saw them – “What about Christ the Redeemer? I bet you when they first put it up, everybody was like, Jesus is going, ‘What’s up? Why’d you kill me?’”

o   Dulcé came on to help Leslie break down the statue story. While Leslie thought it looked like someone going down, from a different angle, Dulcé saw hands holding a penis – Dulcé said, “No matter which way you look at it, it’s a different erotic act, right? It’s like a sexual Rubik’s cube.”

·        Martin Luther King Day

o   This was a fun bit, Leslie going out on the street to figuring out what (mostly white) people were doing for Martin Luther King Day – She told one man, “You’re gonna do two pushups for Martin! This isn’t reparations, but that’s enough.”

o   I laughed at her reaction to a group of women who told her all the tourist things they’d been doing in New York – “Okay, I’m gonna come back to y’all on Juneteenth, and y’all better have done better.”

o   She also scoured the area for a white people who could quote Dr. King beyond “I Have a Dream.” And not even just that speech, beyond the specific words, “I have a dream” – “I will pay you $1 million if you can tell me something else Martin Luther King said.”

·        Interview – Actor Morris Chestnut

o   Chestnut was there to talk about The Best Man: The Final Chapters.

o   I liked what he said about his character’s journey to understand his child exploring their gender identity – He was open about his own reticence about taking on the plotline but acknowledged that this topic isn’t spoken about enough in the Black community and needs more of a light on it.

Wednesday, January 18

·        Headlines – Universities banning TikTok, record number of gun confiscations at airports, newest George Santos scandal, the price of eggs skyrockets

o   Great line, about George Santos – “Do you know how much you have to lie to be known as the lying congressman?”

o   Santos’s latest scandal is a claim that he pocketed money that was meant to help a homeless disabled veteran’s sick service dog – “Oh my god, you evil and stupid! You gonna mess with somebody’s dog? Have you not heard of John Wick? Your ass is in trouble!”

o   I laughed at Leslie’s impression of chickens holding farmers over a barrel now that eggs are so expensive – “What’s up, bitch? You want these eggs? What you gonna do for me?”

·        Correspondent Piece (Roy) – Golden State Warriors visit the White House

o   Roy got to briefly speak with a bunch of people, including Biden and several of the Warriors – He asked Steph Curry, “Better crib: your crib or the White House?”, and the two of them started conspiring to find the White House kitchen together.

·        Interview – Planned Parenthood president Alexis McGill Johnson

o   At Leslie’s request, McGill Johnson listed some of the many services Planned Parenthood provides from cancer screenings to STI testing – She added, “And yes, we proudly provide abortion, because that is also healthcare.”

o   Leslie also wanted to make it clear that those services aren’t just for women and pregnant-capable people – She urged, “Tell me the services you provide for people with penises.”

Thursday, January 19

·        Headlines – Stephen A. Smith shades Rihanna ahead of Super Bowl halftime show, U.S. hits national debt limit

o   I liked this reaction from Leslie – “You know what, Stephen A. Smith? You need to act like your hairline and back the fuck off.”

o   Desi came on to help “explain” the national debt limit, but it was mostly a bit about her own gambling debts – After Leslie offered to help her out, Desi replied, “I would never beg you for money on a show that the IRS watches.”

·        Long Story Short – Men fighting

o   This was a nice piece from Leslie. We opened on a montage of news clips of guys raging/brawling at minimal provocation – “Why does every guy think that if he gets a sword in his hand, he’s gonna automatically be Steven Segal? But when he actually gets it in his hand, he’s like Jerry Lewis.”

o   A study showed that 15% of men say they don’t have any close friends – “I mean, women got our problems, but we always have some homegirls, you know what I’m saying? We got ‘em, you know? But men, they have nobody, so what do they do? They take all of those emotions and they bottle that shit up, and then they throw that bottle at the cashier.”

o   Loved this – “Men treat therapy like Nick Cannon hates condoms.” The cherry on top was Leslie looking into the camera to add, “They’re here to help you, Nick.”

o   Good line – “These dudes will use everything else for therapy except actual therapy. They’re like, ‘Running is my therapy.’ No, running is running! Therapy needs to be your therapy!’”

o   We saw a clip where a teenage boy admitted to hugging his friend when he was upset, then said that they told agreed not to tell anyone about it – “A hug? That’s what men want to keep private? But y’all airdrop your dick pics to a stranger on the subway. Priorities, fellas!!”

·        Interview – Radio host Charlamagne tha God

o   Charlamagne has been a champion for therapy and male vulnerability, so his interview followed from the previous piece – In discussing some of what he’s learned in therapy, he said, “You gotta give your parents grace. You gotta give them grace, because they were doing the best they could with what they had.”

I enjoyed Leslie’s stint as host. Obviously, her comedic energy is very different than Trevor’s, and she had a blast yelling at the screen. On the whole, I thought a lot of the jokes stayed more at surface-level humor, without delving deeper, but she had some good moments that felt uniquely hers. Her man-on-the-street interviews with tourists on Martin Luther King Day was really good, and her interview with Alexis McGill Johnson felt different than Trevor’s would have.

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