*Spoilers for an assortment of BNE stories.*
I’ve loved all the common traits I’ve talked about so far for Big Neurodivergent Energy stories, and pretty much all of them contribute to my love for these stories. But I think today’s entries are the biggest key for me. It’s the themes that take them from stories I love to stories I need, the stories that sit inside me and warm my soul.
Found Family
This one’s maybe a bit obvious, but that’s okay. Found family dynamics aren’t exclusive to BNE stories, of course. But they’re such an important factor in many of them. Frequently, these are characters who haven’t belonged anywhere else, a ragtag band of disparate misfits who lovingly get on each other’s nerves and will defend each other to the death. We see it with ensembles, like Community, Our Flag Means Death, and Maya and the Three. We see it in smaller configurations too, a few characters who become one another’s everything. This relationship might have a romantic bent (more on that another day!), like we see with Elizabeth and Calvin in Lessons in Chemistry or Crowley and Aziraphale in Good Omens. But they can be more familial too: think Matilda and Miss Honey in Matilda, or my beloved Nimona and Ballister in Nimona. Whether a big group or just a duo, these found families make it safe for the characters to be who they are.
Broken But Worthy of Love
Some subscribe to the notion that, before someone is ready to love someone else, they need to learn to love themselves first. That they have to work on themselves, get their own house in order, and then they’ll be ready. But BNE stories don’t tend to follow that idea. Instead, they often take the view that the people least “ready” for love are the most in need of it. Someone doesn’t need to “fix” themselves before they can be loved—they can be met where they are, messy and broken but still deserving. On Pushing Daisies, Ned is riddled with trauma and trust issues, but he still gets to be with Chuck. On Our Flag Means Death, Ed is convinced he’s an unlovable monster, but Stede loves him just as desperately when he’s at his lowest. On Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, throwing herself into ill-advised relationships has been a toxic pattern for Rebecca, and once she gets into a good therapy program, she needs to be convinced that she still deserves real love along her way to healing. In A Wrinkle in Time, Calvin compliments Meg’s “dreamboat eyes” right after she breaks down crying in front of him and emphasizes what a mess she is. For a familial example, let’s look at Everything Everywhere All at Once: Evelyn complains that Joy is getting fat and never calls in the same breath that she says she’d rather be standing in a parking lot arguing with her daughter than anywhere else in the multiverse.
Forgiveness is Given, Not Earned
Related to the paragraph above, this one really hits me hard. I don’t know why, but fandom involves a lot of judgment: which character is in the wrong, how much do they need to be punished for what they’ve done, and what do they have to suffer before other characters should forgive them or they can be considered “redeemed”? From Ted Lasso, “Nate doesn’t deserve to come back to AFC Richmond after how he betrayed Ted!” From Our Flag Means Death, “I can’t believe Izzy apologize to Ed, the man who shot him, at the end of season 2!” From Good Omens, “Aziraphale better grovel before Crowley forgives him in season 3!” And so on and so on. But so often, BNE stories reject that punitive mindset in favor of grace. AFC Richmond invites Nate to come back. Izzy recognizes that the hurt Ed caused him doesn’t erase the hurt he caused Ed (and vice versa.) The Twelfth Doctor immediately forgives Clara for a deep, grief-stricken betrayal on Doctor Who, and a major thesis of The Good Place is that humans will never be “good enough,” but condemning them for that robs them of their chance to always do better.
Radical Compassion
Following the last paragraph, this is a storytelling theme I’ve loved for years, and it’s something I’ve written about before, but it’s only much more recently that I connected it to BNE stories. It goes beyond forgiving friends/former friends who’ve wronged us, seeing hostility and antagonism and instead choosing love and empathy. It’s Moana singing to Te Kā in Moana. It’s Waymond begging Evelyn to “please, be kind” during the final battle in Everything Everywhere All at Once. It’s Kipo repeatedly trying to connect with her opponents in Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts. It’s Meg realizing that the only way she can fight IT is by loving Charles Wallace in A Wrinkle in Time. I just love it so much.
Radical Change to Make Life Worth Living
This is an important component. A major theme with neurodivergent-coded protagonists is that they don’t fit in with the larger world around them, not just because they’re “weird” or “socially awkward,” but because they have A Thing. Something inside of them that needs to come out, or something calling to them that they need to follow. When this happens, their story is almost always about going against everything society tells them they’re supposed to do/want in order to pursue their Thing and hold it close to them. It’s why so many Disney princess resonate on an ND level, from Ariel to Moana to Mulan. On Doctor Who, we see it in how the Doctor runs away from Gallifrey to travel in the TARDIS, seeing the universe and helping people in trouble. Amélie becomes a full-time do-gooder, concocting elaborate schemes to better people’s lives in inventive and whimsical ways. In Polite Society, no one understands Ria’s fierce dedication to becoming a stuntwoman, and she won’t let anybody tell her that she can’t succeed because of her size. On DuckTales, Scrooge leads the family on expeditions, not just to find treasure and increase his wealth, but because adventuring is in their blood and they couldn’t be content with “ordinary” lives. On We Are Lady Parts, Amina keeps telling herself everything “proper” she’s supposed to be doing with her life, but playing with Lady Parts unlocks something in her that she never knew was there. On Our Flag Means Death, Stede literally runs away from his life as a wealthy landowner to become a pirate!