"Better a fallen rocket than never a burst of light."
~ Tom Stoppard, The Invention of Love

Monday, October 21, 2024

Neurodivergent (Headcanon) Alley: Ted Lasso (Ted Lasso)

*Ted-related spoilers.*

Canonically, of course, Ted deals with anxiety and panic attacks, which I would consider a form of neurodivergence (medical science seems split on that categorization.) However, I’m sticking with the “(Headcanon)” in the title, since I do primarily want to talk about autism and ADHD today. One of the things I love about Big Neurodivergent Energy shows is how we can see so many different types of autistic and/or other ND characters interacting. Ted’s neurodivergent coding is wildly different from Roy’s, or that of any other character on the show, really, and I love that for him.

We know that Ted leads with positivity in virtually all things, and that feels AuDHD to me in a few different ways. First, his upbeat attitude and unwavering belief in the best of others makes him stand out, but he doesn’t mind if people think he’s weird, naïve, or corny. He rejects neurotypical society’s expectations of judgment or grudge-holding, instead opting for forgiveness and optimism. From the outside, he might look like he’s just a pushover, but his philosophy is actually pretty radical, and he’s strong enough in his sense of self to prefer being curious over judgmental, as the iconic darts scene in season 1 demonstrates.

Ted’s positivity could also be read as his form of masking, putting a good face on everything to disguise his own discomforts and worries. As a masking strategy, it’s maybe a little unusual, because again, it doesn’t help Ted blend into neurotypical society—just the opposite. But he’s different in a way that often ingratiates him with others. His patient kindness and loving outlook wins people over, and under his influence, the entire Richmond atmosphere starts to change. Now, I think Ted’s behavior is primarily motivated by wanting to help others be their best selves, not by wanting to be accepted and liked. But I do think some of this is a defense mechanism. He has major issues with avoiding uncomfortable and “negative” emotions, and he thinks that if he’s happy-go-lucky Ted, he can just keep smiling until everything’s okay for real.

And yes, there’s definitely a people-pleasing aspect to this. Ted doesn’t crave people’s approval through what’s considered a traditionally masculine lens, and he does use relentless optimism as a way to keep people from seeing his fears sometimes. But he also really, really wants what’s best for people, sometimes neglecting his own needs in the process. More than anything, he wants people to feel happy, fulfilled, and safe to be themselves, and he puts a lot of energy into creating an environment where others are okay. Which is a great thing to want! Ted is an amazing person, and I love him for his considerate, giving nature. But because he almost always puts others first, that can prevent him from asking for help when he needs it or expressing his own frustrations and struggles.

Besides that, Ted adores wordplay—he’s full of amusing turns of phrase, he likes hokey jokes, and he plays all sorts of word games with Beard. He tends to misunderstand ambiguous statements, like when Rebecca offers to show him around and he thinks she means sightseeing spots around London, not the football club. He can be inattentive of his surroundings, which can be an issue when he’s not used to crossing the road in a country with left-side driving. He keeps an open jar of peanut butter on his counter at home so he can dip his finger in it whenever he wants, and he has sensory issues around sparkling water. He likes to entertain himself with silly or thought-provoking hypotheticals. He dances when he’s happy and fidgets with his hands when he’s anxious. I love him so much!

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