"Better a fallen rocket than never a burst of light."
~ Tom Stoppard, The Invention of Love

Saturday, October 19, 2019

News Satire Roundup: October 13th-October 17th


Sunday, October 13 – First was Stupid Watergate II, of course, looking at the arrests of two Rudy Giuliani associates (who appear to be as blatantly shady as they are cozily tied to the Trump camp.) The clip of Trump ham-fistedly dodging the question of whether or not Giuliani is still his lawywer was great. We also returned to the NBA’s capitulation to China on tweets about the Hong Kong protests; removing fans from a game for supporting Hong Kong was still the biggest “wow” moment for me. After a bizarre montage of Shep Smith’s time at Fox News, the main story was on the National Weather Service. While not my favorite, John ably demonstrated why moving to a more wholly-privitized weather system would be idea (ex: warning railroad clients of a tornado but not the non-paying residents of a nearby town,) and I loved the montage of the sullen local weatherman passive-aggressively reporting on the weather.


Monday, October 13 – We started with a jaw-dropping marathon run, followed by “baby prenups” for dividing childcare duties and the news that farmers have more sex than any other profession (with journalists at the bottom of the list – Trevor speculated that they don’t have time for sex in the Trump era.) Next was the arrest of Rudy Giuliani’s associates. Loved the comment, “Do people who look like criminals become criminals, or do people who become criminals start to look like criminals?” We also looked at the situation in the Middle East, in which Trump bragged about Saudi Arabia “paying us” to send troops there. Neal Brennan had a good piece on Trump’s attitude toward democracy. The premise? Trump thinks he “bought” America and therefore we all now work for him. DJ Black Coffee was the guest. His comments on fighting against haing bongos and African masks put on his early album covers were interesting to me.

Tuesday, October 14 – Latest debate. Trevor covered the “narrow” debate somehow having more candidates (“Everyone get your presidential candidate spayed or neutered!”) and the obligatory Twitter commentary from OJ Simpson. Debate-coverage highlights included Tom Steyer coming out against billionaires, questions about candidates’ age (loved Trevor’s comment that it seems like they asked other candidates as cover for asking Bernie Sanders about his heart attack – “Tulsi, are you too young and fit? Is it possible you’ll die of young age?”), and Kamala Harris trying to start a “real-life Twitter beef” with Elizabeth Warren over Trump’s Twitter account. Next, Roy offered his services as a surrogate for candidates’ families while they’re campaigning. Good interview with journalist Alex Wagner. I liked what she said about the Democratic Party still trying to define what it is right now and this primary in part deciding that.

Wednesday, October 15 – Opening blurbs on Lebron James sucking up to China, Gina Rodriguez posting a video of herself singing the N-word in a song (I liked Trevor’s suggestion that rappers make “safe” versions of their songs for non-Black people,) and controlling the new Google Pixel with gestures (fun bit on the accidental havoc Bernie Sanders would cause.) Next was a story on Joe and Hunter Biden, mostly focused on the Trump kids’ hypocrisy, acting aghast at the idea of using your dad’s name to get ahead – not to mention their international business “coincidentally” tying in with diplomacy in the administration. The first of two guests was Cyntoia Brown-Long, sharing her own experiences and her quest to reform punishment for juvenile offenders. The second guest was Ali Wong. I loved how disdainfully she related the story of a white male comedian asking her if performing while pregnant was “her thing” now.

Thursday, October 16 – We started with “the blob” at the Paris zoo (with its 720 sexes – “Hey, blob, what are your pronouns?” “All of them!!”), a major coffin find in Egypt, and California’s new law allowing people to take roadkill home and cook it. There was so much Trump news that we needed an Ain’t Nobody Got Time for That: planning to host the next G-7 at one of his resorts, trading barbs with Nancy Pelosi (a.k.a. word-for-word accusing her of the same thing she said he did,) and congratulating himself on a 5-day ceasefire between Turkey and Syria, along with Gordon Sondland’s testimony in the impeachment inquiry and Rick Perry leaving the administration. Dulcé offered some speculation that Trump wants out but, being too proud to step down, is trying to bait America into “breaking up” with him. I loved the interview with Taika Waititi, especially his stories about directing Jojo Rabbit while in costume as Hitler.

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