As I’ve
said before, the atypical “triangle” of Whizzer-Marvin-Trina in Falsettos really interests me. Having already looked at Marvin/Whizzer and
Whizzer-Trina, it’s time to look at the last side of the triangle: Trina and Marvin. In some ways, this is the messiest side of
all (spoilers.)
Marvin’s
whole “tight-knit family” arrangement is intriguing. It’s good that he wants the various parts of
his family – “kid, [ex-]wife, and lover” – to all get along, and no matter
what, Marvin and Trina will always be connected because they’re Jason’s parents. But the way
Marvin goes about that is far less about peaceful coexistence than it is about
control and ownership. I can’t tell if
he’s aiming for the former – later in
Act II, this is finally achieved when the whole family comes together over
Whizzer’s illness – but for much of the show, they’re definitely getting the latter.
That’s
because, for Marvin, Trina is still “his wife” and thus beholden to him. That means cooking meals for the family with
Whizzer, being prepared to cater to any and all of Marvin’s whims, and most
significantly, not exploring new relationships the way Marvin has. Even though Marvin was never attracted to
Trina and can’t offer her romantic love, and even though he’s moved on with
Whizzer, he resents the idea of Trina doing the same. When she starts seeing Mendel (admittedly
complicated, since Mendel is Marvin’s psychiatrist as well as Trina’s and Jason’s,) Marvin goes into full
meltdown mode, because in his mind, Trina is still his.
Needless
to say, this puts a tremendous strain on Trina to be caught between Marvin’s
demands and her own feelings for Mendel.
(Not to mention, Marvin’s continued preoccupation with Trina affects his
relationship with Whizzer, and Jason is negatively impacted by all the tension
– this is Marvin at his worst, and it’s hard on the whole family.) Marvin’s need for Trina to conduct herself on
his terms interferes with Trina’s
right to pursue her own happiness, something she desperately needs. Her marriage to Marvin (as with most of her
life thus far) was marked by denying her needs/desires for the sake of
appeasing Marvin. It was unhealthy and
destructive enough when they were married – now that they’re divorced, it’s
awful to see Marvin still trying to exert that level of control over her.
As with
all the relationships in Falsettos, Trina
and Marvin’s dynamic changes in Act II.
We come back from intermission (with a two-year time jump) to learn that
Marvin and Trina now have a more traditional ex-spouse arrangement, sharing
custody of Jason and mainly interacting over matters concerning him, like
planning his bar mitzvah and going to his Little League games. I’m not gonna lie – when Marvin announces, “I
still have my son on the weekends,” and then ruefully adds, “Just on the weekends,” it hurts, and as
much of a mess as the Act I situation is, I do find myself wishing they could
have made it work in a way that was respectful of everyone’s feelings.
But
ultimately, it is for the better. While
Marvin and Trina bicker over the bar mitzvah plans, it’s far healthier than
their previous dynamic. It doesn’t have
the same toxic edge – rather, it’s two stubborn people (still immature at
times) disagreeing over what they want for Jason’s big day. And really, the mere fact that they’re
disagreeing is a huge improvement for them, because it means Trina is holding
her own and standing up for her views instead of getting steamrolled by
Marvin’s demands. Clearly, getting more
distance between them was a necessary step in allowing them to interact in a
healthier way.
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