Sunday, February 14
· Recap of the Week – Trump’s impeachment trial
o John’s back! It was a welcome return for Last Week Tonight – I’ve missed the show during their hiatus.
o John got to the crux of the matter behind Trump’s lawyers’ gaffes and non-sequiturs – “It might seem they weren’t trying very hard, but that’s because they didn’t have to.”
o On that note, great summation of Ted Cruz’s declaration that the outcome of the trial was predetermined no matter what and no argument from the House impeachment managers would make a difference – “Dead eyes, empty hearts, Ted Cruz.”
o John looked at how Trumpism continues to pervade state legislatures as well, with “the most secure election in modern history” somehow prompting 165 bills in 33 states to limit voting rights.
· And Now This – Valentine’s Day bouquets
o A montage of local news anchors checking out “creative” (read: disgusting) Valentine’s Day bouquets, including arrangements made of corn dogs and bacon.
· Main Story – The next pandemic
o The overarching theme of the story was that our failure to prepare for this pandemic doesn’t mean we’ll have learned our lesson and ready ourselves for the next one – I was chilled by the footage of one expert noting our tendency to lose interest in funding research/safeguards “as soon as we can ghettoize these diseases into marginalized populations.”
o This was an excellent point, re: deforestation and other human practices that put us in closer contact with wildlife – “It’s important to remember that the fact we caught coronavirus from bats isn’t their fault, it’s ours.”
o John also shared plenty of adorable footage of bats in sanctuaries, to drive home the point that the solution isn’t simply to “kill all bats.”
o I laughed out loud at the warning about how Animal Crossing brings numerous species from various parts of the world into close proximity with each other – “That’s not an island paradise! It’s a disease Chernobyl waiting to happen! Shut that shit down!”
o Protecting against future pandemics will be expensive, but John reminded us of what Congress always seems to forgot, that the cost of not addressing problems is way more expensive – the estimated cost of the types of safeguards and preventative measures he discussed in the episode would be about $20-30 billion a year, but the COVID-19 pandemic has already cost us roughly $16 trillion, and it’s not over yet.
Monday, February 15
· Headlines – Evidence that Stonehenge was moved from Wales to England
o Trevor thought that being moved and reassembled explains “why Stonehenge looks so weird” – “Well, maybe the stone goes here…. Why do I have so many screws left over?”
· Pandemic News – New variants discovered in the U.S., admission that New York nursing-home death numbers were lowered
o COVID-19, “the reason you got a fake ID saying you’re 65.”
o I appreciated Trevor’s indignant response to news that Cuomo’s office held back the true numbers on nursing-home deaths – “The explanation that they’re going with is that they thought the Trump administration would use the high nursing-home deaths against them, which, yeah! Usually, if you’re not doing a good job, it gets used against you! That’s the whole point of data!”
· Main Story – Trump’s impeachment acquittal
o Loved this line – “True to form, Trump got acquitted 57 to 43. This dude just loves losing the popular vote!”
o Mitch McConnell’s craven response in a nutshell – “Basically, what he’s saying is that Trump caused the riot, Trump is super guilty, and Mitch just hopes that someday, someone else will do something about it.”
o This was such a salient point – “Out of anyone, Mitch McConnell is the one person who always finds a way to get things done if he wants to get it done.”
o This made me laugh – “That is what I’m talking about: 2 and 0! Obama never even won a single impeachment! That shit’s embarrassing!”
· Correspondent Piece (Roy, Desi, Ronny & Michael) – Reflections on the pandemic
o At first, I thought the hook was going to be the others talking about all the hobbies they took up in quarantine while Ronny was like, “What are you guys talking about? I’ve been in Australia where life is normal now!”, since he’s done a couple bits on Australia during the pandemic, but instead, they went the route of Ronny having spent the pandemic unproductive and existentially freaking out, which is also super valid.
o I felt this line – “What is wrong with you guys? What kind of maniac uses the apocalypse for self-improvement?”
o The other correspondents’ bits got progressively more outrageous as the piece went on, with Michael completing flawless oil paintings on the fly, and Desi commenting, “Wasn’t April a mess? The only thing I managed to do was learn telekinesis.”
· Montage – Tucker Carlson Jeopardy
o This was a fun bit, juxtaposing clips of Tucker Carlson being terrible with his disingenuous “questions” framed as Jeopardy-style responses. My favorite one was, “There’s no explicit evidence that George Floyd was murdered by a cop,” paired with the Jeopardy answer-in-the-form-of-a-question, “What is this disinformation?”
· Interview – Actor Neil Patrick Harris
o This was a great compliment from Trevor to start the interview, about the many excellent projects Harris has been involved with – “Do you think you have the Midas touch, or do you just know where Midas is and what he’s about to touch?”
o I liked this comment from Harris about family life in quarantine – “I really feel like I know my family better than I ever have, and that’s chaotic, but it’s also kinda fantastic.”
o Harris was there to talk about his new miniseries It’s a Sin, about the early days of HIV/AIDS in the U.K. – I really liked his comment, “My job is actor. I don’t feel comfortable in the role of educator, I’m not very educated. So when I’m able to be a part of something where” people can learn about that part of history in an affecting/accessible way, it’s a privilege for him.
o Good observation from Trevor – “It’s interesting to explore the paradox of the joy that was contained in a world that was overshadowed, as you said earlier, by this ominous feeling.”, appreciating that the project isn’t just “all happy” or “all sad” but instead, “a complicated reality of what it was.”
Tuesday, February 16
· Headlines – Winter storms across the U.S., “Yardi Gras” in New Orleans, Dr. Fauci awarded for his work
o Before we got going, I liked this “vaccine tip” – “If you’ve already been vaccinated, it is still important to wear a mask, because it’s the only thing that hides how happy you are. None of us want to see that shit! You showing off with your vaccine; put a mask on and hide your face, you lucky bastard!”
o Trevor noted that the winter storms are even more challenging for states like Texas, which aren’t used to that kind of weather – “They don’t have snow shovels out there! Their best bet is to grab their AR-15 and shoot each snowflake before it lands.”
o I agree that cancelling the Mardi Gras parade this year was a sensible choice – “I mean, during a pandemic, a tuba just turns into a COVID fire hose!”
· Main Story – Attacks on Asian Americans
o This was a great line – “Good for Daniel Wu and Daniel Dae Kim for putting up the cash for a reward, but it’s sad that they even had to resort to this. If you know that someone racially attacked a senior citizen, you should snitch on sight. No incentive should be needed! Like, who is out there watching their TV like, ‘I mean, sure, I saw that dude attack that old Asian man, but what’s in it for me?’”
o I loved this reaction – “Good lord. An 867% increase in reported hate crimes against Asians in New York City. 867%! This shit is like the GameStop of racism!”
o Ronny came on to offer tips on how to support the Asian American community, from reporting hate crimes to volunteering to chaperone Asian American seniors in your area, and he added this at the end – “Oh, and there’s one more way to help. Don’t be a f**king racist asshole who attacks old Asian people, okay? What the f**k is wrong with you? Shoving an old lady isn’t gonna make your dick any bigger, okay? Just buy a convertible like everybody else!”
· CPTime (Roy) – history of Black doctors
o Roy said, “For the longest time, Black people’s contributions to the medical field have been overlooked” – I loved his turn into a close-up shot to add, “And by overlooked, I mean stolen by white people!”
o On why segregating blood banks by race was stupid and unnecessary – “Trust me, I received plasma from a white man once. It did not affect my credit score at all.”
· Interview – Magnate/Philanthropist Bill Gates
o In talking about the vaccine, Trevor and Gates joked about the conspiracy theory that Gates is using the vaccines to implant microchips into people – good grief.
o Most of the interview was focused on the climate crisis, and Gates discussed the importance of leaders stepping in to incentivize industries to “[drive] innovation faster than what would normally take place” in order to help bring down the “green premiums” on products that are better for the environment but carry a bigger upfront price tag.
o Gates acknowledged how important it is to make sure that communities centered around traditional-energy industries (coal, oil, etc.) are considered during the transition to more renewable energy – “Right now, there’s a temptation to deny the problem altogether, because if you feel like you’re going to be left out of the solution, you just want denial.”
Wednesday, February 17
· Headlines – Biden town hall, Atlantic City Trump Plaza casino demolished, Trump attacks Mitch McConnell
o Another good description of COVID – “It’s the reason you keep freshing vaccine websites like they’re selling Coachella tickets.”
o Excellent response to Biden’s prediction that vaccine efforts will have really turned the situation around by Christmas – “Wow. Who would’ve seen this coming? After all that talk from Trump, it turns out Biden is the one who’s gonna have people saying ‘Merry Christmas’ again.”
o I loved this line – “Honestly, if it comes down to Trump vs. Mitch? I don’t know, man, my money’s on Trump. Because have you ever seen a rabid Mitch McConnell supporter? No, because they don’t exist. Even Mitch is like, ‘Look, I can take me or leave me.’”
· Main Story – Winter storm crisis in Texas
o I laughed at this description of Texas’s winter storm and the ensuing energy crisis – “Forget Texans, this would be too much for Elsa! ‘Let it go- Hell, no, this is some bullshit, I’m going to Aruba!’”
o I loved Trevor’s response to a Texas mayor who resigned after telling his constituents on Facebook that it wasn’t the government’s job to help them after power grids failed and they’ve been without heat or water for days – “Here’s a question: why did this guy even want to be a mayor if he didn’t want to help people? You don’t become a doctor and then tell people, ‘Transplant your own liver, bitches! Why do I gotta do everything?! I’m a doctor!’”
o Great point, on the energy companies that didn’t pay to winterize and maintain their infrastructure – “This just goes to show you, you can’t put profit over quality and safety. Money’s not worth a whole lot if you have to burn it to keep warm!”
· Correspondent Piece (Dulcé) – Black sororities
o This piece came about because of Kamala Harris’s alum status at one of the “Divine 9,” a group of Black sororities and fraternities, with Dulcé interviewing three Black sorority sisters.
o When Dulcé asked, “I’m sorry, you’re telling me that a historically Black college did not want Black women students to organize as a group?”, I loved one of the interviewees casually responding, “Well, there’s something called, you know, sexism.”
o But Dulcé described that was “the weird kind of paradox that Black women live in,” receiving pushback from organizing at their own Black colleges while also being excluded by mostly-white suffragette movements – She summed it up (in song) as, “All right, who’s gonna hate us today?”
· Interview – Author Heather McGhee
o McGhee was there to discuss her book The Sum of Us, on the economic cost of racism in America – As Trevor put it, “Racism is one of the craziest concepts to me because it causes the people who oftentimes harbor the belief to hurt themselves.”
o McGhee discussed the difficulty in getting white Americans to see through the myth they’ve been sold that economic success is a zero-sum game in which they can’t allow Black people to succeed for fear of losing what they have.
o This was a nice summation of what one white minimum-wage worker realized as she finally got involved in multiracial labor organizing – “For me to come up, you’ve gotta come up too. As long as we’re divided, we’re conquered.”
o Very well said – “We have seen white people, with their votes, turn their backs on the formula that created the great middle class, that would’ve made all of our lives better, because they would have to share it with people they had been taught – and that’s the key, taught – to disdain and distrust.”
o I loved this line – “Our truth in this country is so much more terrible but also, because of the overcoming, so much more beautiful than we’ve been allowed to truly know.”
Thursday, February 18
· Headlines – Ted Cruz flies to Cancun during Texas weather/power crisis. Perseverance rover lands on Mars
o I loved this – “I’m not even mad that you were selfish. I’m mad that you were so stupid! How can you be in politics for 10 years and still have no idea how bad this would make you look? What were you thinking?!”
o This bit made me laugh – “If you ask me, you don’t need to be digging in the dirt and analyzing soil samples to find signs of life on Mars! If you wanna know if anyone lives there, just go up there and shout, ‘Cancel culture isn’t real!’ Someone will pop up from behind a rock like, ‘Tell that to Chris Harrison!’”
· Main Story – School reopening debate
o True on so many levels – “Okay. It’s good to finally have guidelines for how to open schools during a pandemic, but it’s kind of discouraging that the guidelines are, ‘Try not to have a pandemic in your area.’ Because it’s like, ‘Uh, yeah, that would be nice, but we wanna keep going to T.G.I. Fridays, so what’s your plan B?’”
o This was a great joke, on parents who are balancing working from work while their kids are remote learning – “Imagine presenting a sales meeting right as your kid’s teacher is getting to the end of Charlotte’s Web! ‘So, as you can see, third-quarter projections are- wait, she dies?!’”
o Oh man, it was all in the delivery on this one – “To all the parents out there, I know that these are unprecedented and scary times, but please don’t forget, teachers are not the enemy, okay? Your children are the enemy. If their dumb asses didn’t need to be educated, nobody would be fighting at all!”
· Fake Commercial – “Half-Day Getaways” to Cancun
o Fun tourism ad for Ted Cruz-style vacations that include returning in shame the following day – I liked the option to spring for the “Bad Optics” package.
· The Daily Showography – Tucker Carlson
o Desi narrated this short bio-documentary appropriately titled Tucker Carlson: Man of a Thousand Faces (But Also Somehow Only One Face).
o Great description of the legacy of Crossfire – “There, he helped steer cable news away from meaningful discourse and more towards people shouting talking points at each other, like a Housewives reunion.”
o The piece included the retroactive weirdness of Carlson’s time at MSNBC, where he was a colleague of Rachel Maddow’s – “It’s weird to see now, like Emperor Palpatine going to brunch with Baby Yoda.”
o Excellent burn – “Tucker was on fire like a cross on a Black family’s lawn.”
· Interview – NBA player Russell Westbrook
o It’s so nice that part of this interview with a professional athlete included talk about the fashions he wears when he arrives at the court – As Westbrook explained to Trevor, “I express myself through clothes.”
o More so than basketball, Westbrook was there to talk about a new documentary he’s helping to make on the Tulsa Massacre, and his Why Not? foundation.
o I liked that his foundation serves youth from a variety of angles, looking at everything from education in tech to mental health and wellness to financial literacy.
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