News Satire Roundup: June 3rd-June 7th

Sunday, June 3 – Craziness, with Trump playing into North Korean propaganda by praising the letter they sent to get him back to the summit table, despite later admitting he hadn’t read it.  Next were two stories that were both completely wild for different reasons:  first, a prominent Putin critic faking his own death to get the jump on some assassins, and then, the discovery that the chairman of the British Monarchist Society is actually a New Yorker.  The latter piece was followed by a delightful “And Now This” of the Speaker of the House of Commons very politely chiding his fellow MPs.  The main story was on guardianship in elder care, or more specifically, the abuse of it, with fraudulent guardians bleeding seniors dry with little reliable legal recourse to protect them.  It was a depressing story, brightened only by the end-of-episode summation by a winning group of older actors including the likes of Rita Moreno(!) and Fred Willard.

Monday, June 4 – First up was an off-duty FBI agent accidentally shooting someone during a dancing mishap(?) in a club, followed by quick notes on the latest Scott Pruitt scandal (sending an EPA aide to buy a used mattress from the Trump Hotel?) and Rick Santorum claiming Obama exacerbated racism more than Trump – I loved Trevor’s “agreement,” saying that, before Obama, no one called the president the N-word.  Next up was team Trump’s latest reactions to the Mueller investigation, with Rudy Giuliani saying the president can’t be indicted and Trump tweeting that he has the power to pardon himself, juxtaposed, naturally, with his campaign speeches about no one being above the law.  Story on the back-on-for-now North Korea summit; the joke that it was like Roseanne, one 3 a.m. tweet away from being cancelled again, was great.  Awkwafina was the guest, discussing both Ocean’s 8 and Crazy Rich Asians.

Tuesday, June 5 – We opened on Miss America dropping the swimsuit competition and focusing on contestants’ talents and achievements – I liked the joke about men then perving on a woman’s “biochemistry degree” instead of her body.  Quick bit on Apples new’s iOS before moving onto Trump disinviting the Eagles to the White House to save face.  Characteristic display of petty foot-stomping from our president, and I liked the note on how he’s tried to flip it back to the anthem protests, even though no Eagles players took part in them.  Hasan reported on the upcoming Ramadan fast-breaking dinner Trump is hosting, morbidly curious to see the trainwreck and applauding the Muslims with the fortitude to face Trump after 16 hours of fasting and being unable to swear.  Loved the interview with Brian Tyree Henry, talking Hotel Artemis, Atlanta, and his plans to make a collaboration with Trevor happen.

Wednesday, June 6 – Quick blurbs to start:  California primaries, airline bathrooms getting even smaller (with Desi demo-ing a life-sized model,) and Trump commuting Alice Marie Johnson’s sentence after speaking with Kim Kardashian – I laughed at Trevor deciding to stop telling jokes about Kim, just in case he ever wound up in jail someday.  Great story on Facebook and the idea that conflict is good for its business model.  I really liked the skit the correspondents did making “Facebook” a real place, with Roy (as a bartender) keeping people drinking/fighting till all hours by stirring up divisions between them.  Ronny had a fun piece on the (stupid) new trend of dangerous “adventure playgrounds.”  I loved his point that the whole thing was just tricking kids into building their own playground.  The guest, writer Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, talked feminism in parenthood and the importance of bringing men onboard for real change.

Thursday, June 7 – Loved the opening story about Eagles player Malcolm Jenkins’s silent interview protest – Trevor calling it Love, Blackually and saying that racial equality is Black people’s Keira Knightley was awesome, and I liked the joke that it was Trump-proof because we all know he doesn’t read.  More on Scott Pruitt’s increasing list of scandals, which Trevor compared to a Star Wars opening crawl.  I also liked the theorizing that all the bizarre scandals make sense when looked at from the context of Pruitt just being ridiculously cheap.  Michael reported on various movements within California to secede or split into 2-3 parts.  I enjoyed him trolling the secession guy for “stealing America’s ideas.”  The guest was Regina King.  While talking about her new Netflix show Seven Seconds, she and Trevor discussed the perception among white people that she’s just “come out of nowhere.”