News Satire Roundup: June 17th-June 21st

Sunday, June 17 – Fantastic show.  We started with a quick bit on Michael Cohen, then it was onto the North Korea summit and Trump’s creepy envy of Kim Jong-un.  Next was the administration’s defense of its family-separation border policy, with Trump blaming Democrats(?), Jeff Sessions quoting a passage of the Bible that was popular with slaveholders, and of course, John’s righteously-blistering contempt for the lot of them.  The main story looked at China’s president Xi Jingping, the changes he’s making within the country, and the side of China he doesn’t like the world at large to see.  For every funny bit (Xi hates it when people compare him to Winnie the Pooh,) there was an awful instance of government encroachment on private lives (I was chilled by the idea of a “social score,” similar to a credit score in ramifications but given by the government on their impression of your character.) 

Monday, June 18 – After a quick freakout about Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s joint album (whose video just increased the value of the Mona Lisa!), we looked at the ridiculousness of Trump’s “Space Force”; I loved Trevor’s point that Trump is planning to “shoot money into space” after arguing that military exercises in South Korea were too expensive.  Strong story on family separation at the border.  I especially liked Trevor taking Trump to task for pretending that he “hates” the policy and is being held captive by Democrats who refuse to change “their” law.  Another sports piece on the World Cup – a real one this time, with Roy and Michael.  The bit about fans in Mexico triggering a small earthquake by jumping up and down so much in celebration was delightful.  The guest, Rep. Karen Bass, talked about her experience working for child welfare and what the administration is doing with its family separation policy.

Tuesday, June 19 – Good point about it being high time 911 can see our location from our phones, given that most apps can do the same thing.  More on the family separation policy, looking at reactions both outraged (including from Republicans) and equivocating (mainly from Fox News.)  There was a repeat of “it’s okay to take someone’s kids from them if you keep them somewhere nice” argument, and I loved Trevor’s entreaty to call Fox News, in lieu of our representatives, to get Trump to change his mind.  Roy reported on Wilmot Collins, a Liberian refugee who became mayor of Helena, deep in Trump country; I really liked Roy’s astonishment at the ballsiness of Collins campaigning door-to-door at the homes of random white people in Montana.  Becca Heller, who directs a program aimed at assisting refugees, talked about the current situation at the border while describing her own experiences working with refugees.

Wednesday, June 20 – Opening blurbs on Canada legalizing recreational pot (Trevor suspected they’re just rubbing it in America’s face now) and the World Cup (with fans staying to clean up the stadium after their team won!)  Great catch-all story on immigration.  I loved what Trevor said about how this is nothing new for America – Jeff Sessions’s biblical arguments for family separation were used by slaveholders, Trump’s “they’re just cute kids now, but in ten years…” fearmongering was used against Jewish refugee kids in the 1930s, and Kjiersten Nielson’s point about how nice the detention centers are was used to describe Japanese-American internment camps.  Later, Trevor and Michael discussed Stephen Miller’s role in all this and made themselves feel better by unloading on him.  Dan Reynolds of Imagine Dragons was the guest, talking about a documentary he produced on LGBTQ acceptance and the Mormon church.

Thursday, June 21 – I enjoyed Trevor’s commentary on the new gestures Trump was “trying out” at a rally in Minnesota, especially the bit about imagining if the TV was muted.  Next up was an Ain’t Nobody Got Time for That, hitting on a horrific Russian Burger King ad, plans for a “white civil rights” rally in D.C., the “I Really Don’t Care, Do U?” jacket Melania Trump wore to look at undocumented children taken from their parents (stay classy, Trumps,) and a woman injured by a hot dog cannon at a Phillies game – I loved the joke that you never knew what a “shooting” in the U.S. will entail.  Desi had a good piece on panels in cable news, breaking down the factors that make good TV – tons of talking/shouting over each other, little to no moderation – but not good news.  The guest was Mike Shinoda of Linkin Park; he talked about how he became an advocate for destigmatizing mental health struggles and championing self-care.